


Juliet Walks Into Happiness

by ClaireFisher



Series: Words In Between [13]
Category: Psych (TV 2006)
Genre: Episode: s03e08 Gus Walks Into a Bank, F/M, Falling In Love, Romance, Shules, boardwalk, glow - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:34:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27514675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClaireFisher/pseuds/ClaireFisher
Summary: Juliet had to raise his hopes, to lean in and to hold his hand for all that was dear and loving in her life, to allow him in just enough to come crashing his illusion down a few weeks later, just because she had to hope too, just because she had to believe, even if it was for a second, that Shawn was everything she ever wanted.Post-Ep 03x08: Gus Walks Into a Bank
Relationships: Juliet O'Hara/Shawn Spencer
Series: Words In Between [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1817497
Comments: 10
Kudos: 11





	Juliet Walks Into Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! I'm back with another fanfic part of the series Words In Between, which consist of extensions of my short stories posted in my multi-chap fic All Seasons With You :)
> 
> This one was a request made by the lovely Montecristo23 (thank you always for your support) and something I was already planing in writing, as I had stated previously! 
> 
> So this is my perspective of what could have happened between Shawn and Jules on their stroll on the boardwalk! Perhaps is inaccurate, we'll never know, really, but I hope I wrote something plausible and brought some light over Juliet's decision regarding Shawn and Luntz!
> 
> I hope you enjoy it and please, leave a comment. I'll love to hear your opinion, suggestion, or anything else you feel like.
> 
> Thank you for reading <3
> 
> PS: there's a tiny line I borrowed from Gavin James' song "Glow". ;)

The wind blew gently on that warm afternoon, sunset merging with the ocean, seamless, an orange light casting a flattering halo on the scenery around, and, without Juliet’s knowledge on her as well. 

For a change, the boardwalk was calm and empty, a few people crossing it leisurely and some small conversations happening here and there.

Long gone were the hot dogs Shawn had provided them, and now they found themselves walking side by side in silence, something that intrigued Juliet a bit. Giving her best friend’s nature and the years she knew him, quietness was something she believed he was never capable of.

Still, the only sound she could capture was the waves crashing at the shore, some light laughter, and occasional passing by cars. 

In which moment they had achieved that state she couldn’t know, but now that she noticed it, Juliet couldn't help but kept dwelling on why, suddenly, Shawn ceased his words, leaving his trail of stories about past jobs and theories about hot dogs, or opportunities to bring up some culture reference or joke, to hold tight to his silence and own mind.

If anything, it allowed her to think, something she wasn’t so sure she wanted right now.

That whole week was chaotic, to say the least. Between paperwork and cold cases, it was crowned with Shawn getting hostage, an event he brushed away so easily she almost blew at him, having been worried about Gus and him the entire time, despite knowing after only a few minutes, that Shawn was the one calling the shots and that, like every single case he interfered or was involved, he had seen and angle no detective or cop, Chief included, had. 

But, if that was her main concern, she would be flying easily, have been facing worst fears, scared for his life on more occasions than were advised or possible, and in the short period of time they tended to occur, Juliet considered herself a pro in handling her own dread each time Shawn stepped foot outside his apartment, or even inside it, she wasn’t much sure where he could be completely safe.

She had discarded the “under your own watch and arms” for sake of her heart and sanity.

Instead, to her pure luck she may add ironically, Juliet had to deal with the turmoil of mixed feelings engulfing her heart to such a constricting point it was a surprise it still beat. 

Perhaps if she had been honest with him those three weeks before, when he asked her to skate with him, much of this heartache could have been avoided. Turning him down on that track maybe could have been easier than facing his broken bluish-green eyes at the bank’s sidewalk the moment he realized she had a connection with Cameron.

It had been only three weeks.

She thought she could refrain him from the truth just enough until she was one hundred percent sure that, being with Cameron, was something that she really wanted.

Deep down she knew it wasn't, but Juliet wasn’t about to accept it that easily.

So she fooled herself and, unwilling, hurt Shawn more than she could ever know.

Because what she didn't realize was that, while she praised her current date on all his good attributes she subtly was implying that Shawn was none of those things, which meant every rejection and turn down on his invitations was another time she reinforced this idea and more unworthy and inappropriate he would feel, masking it all with his carefree spirit, of course, but hurt nonetheless. 

But no, she had to raise his hopes, to lean in and to hold his hand for all that was dear and loving in her life, to allow him in just enough to come crashing his illusion down a few weeks later, just because she had to hope too, just because she had to believe, even if it was for a second, that Shawn was everything she ever wanted.

They took a small turn, still following the path of the boardwalk, but now trailing down the limits of the shore. With her heels in her hands, Juliet allowed her bare feet to touch the still-warm sand, relaxing at the known feeling, letting it soothe her troubled mind and heart just for the moment. 

As she closed her eyes briefly she missed out on how Shawn drank her in, eyes inspecting her every movement, tracing her delicate features gently, as if memorizing every aspect he could from her, in her pink evening dress, a color so flattering to her in his fair opinion, hair down and flowing with the ocean breeze, the downing sunset, in its final glory moments casting a light on her, so pure and bright he might confuse her with the perfect image of those goddesses he once saw portrayed on his art history books back in high school.

Even if he hated every single second of that class, those paintings and sculptures never faded from his brain, as if ever could, but they had something in them, a sparkle, a quality, that caught his eyes immediately making it impossible to forget.

And as he stared at Juliet O’Hara right now, all he could think about was how she exceeds all those beautiful masterpieces.

She was perfect, in all aspects and features.

Maybe it was why it hurt more all the way.

Because even if he wasn’t that ready to dive right into a relationship with her, still too scared to mess up what could be the best thing he ever had in his entire life, Juliet meaning to him more than anyone has ever had, besides Gus, of course, but in a different way no other woman previously has, Shawn wanted nothing more than to have her in his arms, to understand why he was so unfitting of her expectations. 

Who was him behind her eyes? 

His quietness until that moment was mainly caused by these single questions, mingled in a thousand more uncertainties. 

Didn’t she feel the glow too? Anything different, at all? And at the risk of sounding like a teenage girl, the warm feeling in her heart each time they were near?

What so different could Cameron have that Shawn could never possess? 

Coming to a slow stop, Shawn ceased his steps, mind too overloaded, too confused, and, against his own personal vow of never digging deep into emotional conversations or anything more serious, he asked the one question nagging his mind painfully.

He had to know.

And if having an answer meant he would have to tear down a wall or two and be serious for a moment, so he would be.

“Why him, Jules?”

His eyes pierced hers, raw and bright, causing her to back away slightly. 

“Shawn…”

Her tone was grave and warning, as if she was advising him to not press further, not because she wanted to push him away, by now she knew she couldn’t, and hadn't the willpower in her body to do so, but because she had no idea how she was going to answer that.

Why Cameron?

She had answered that question earlier, enumerating qualities she found in him that could validate her point but, deep down, none of those things were what she looked for in a guy, instead, they were the further she could pinpoint from who she truly wanted to be with but that, somehow, still unclear to her, she couldn't. 

And, if she put just a bit more thought about it, Juliet would be forced to admit that Shawn was all those things too, in different levels and perspectives, because Shawn was too much unique to fit any pattern or label, having to put his own special touch in every little thing he did, but yes, he was mature and deep when he wanted to be, caring and loving, even more with people who had earned his affection, and more than once had shown how highly he thought of her and the position she occupied in his life, that afternoon proving once more that, for her happiness, he was compelled to back away. 

“No, Jules. I mean it. Why him? Why Cameron?”

Swallowing down the newly formed knot in her throat, she knew there’s no going around the bush there, Shawn wouldn't drop it and, quite frankly, she owned him that much. She was the one going after him that afternoon, the one who pushed him away and the one turning him down, especially after that Roller Derby experience three weeks ago. 

“I-I don’t know.”

There.

The truth.

No matter how painful or upsetting it could be.

And she expected a victory dance, perhaps his usual mocking, a joke, instead, she saw pain flash in his eyes and, even more surprising, was that he was genuinely sorry for her. 

She was taken aback, mostly because of everything she could think about him, all the feelings leading her to believe that Shawn could never be the guy she wanted, that despite his occasional moments of sanity, he was too wild and commitment-phobic to ever commit to her were shut down.

Her glass of prejudice was shattered to pieces and all she could see now was the Shawn underneath the cloak he wears to approach the rest of the world but which he takes off in her presence. 

The pureness of his feelings, the way he was looking at her right now, so similar to many other moments they shared on the course of those three years of uncertain but solid friendship, almost caused her to lean in and kiss all his sorrow and fear away, to touch his lips and discover the magical mystery behind his love and care.

But she couldn’t.

Not with a rescheduled date.

Not when she had hurt him.

Not when she knew that she couldn't be the woman that he needed.

Because Juliet was aware that the moment she allowed Shawn in her life for good, she could never survive his possible departure. If she let him in he would have to stay forever and Juliet knew he still wasn't there and, quite honestly, she may not be there either.

“I’m sorry for earlier, Jules. But I me-”

“It’s okay. I know.”

His sheepish smile, almost childlike eyes, melted her completely and, even though both had that silent agreement of never transpassing the physical contact on the fear of the aftermaths that could cause, Juliet grabbed his hand, squeezing it briefly but reassuringly, before dropping it again, a smile on her shimmering lips what was needed to bring that knowing grin back at her friend’s face. 

“I should be the one apologizing Shawn. I shouldn’t have…”

“Hey…” - he stepped close, still in safe proximity but near enough to cause Juliet to hold her breath - “Don’t worry. I get it. It’s all good.”

Her eyes twinkled, silently asking if it really was and him knowing how to read her better than anyone else just nodded, affirming her his previous statement and vanishing with the majority of the guilt and pain weighing her heart. 

He told her that all he wanted was for her to be happy, so if there was the smallest possibility of that happening she should go for it. 

Now she believed in his words for sure. 

No doubt, no hesitation.

But, as terrifying as this realization could be, Juliet noticed just now that, perhaps, she would only be happy if Shawn was there.

If he was hers. 

And when they returned to Psych, Shawn escorted Juliet back to her car, making sure she was safe inside before stepping away, watching her drive until her green beetle disappeared on the avenue.

All the while he wondered if he crossed her mind because she was always in his. 

On the way home, Juliet was certain of what she had to do.

Before she could even change clothes her phone was in her ear and she couldn't be happier for having the machine to answer her.

“Hi Cameron, this is Juliet. Listen, I… I don’t think I can make it to our date tomorrow. Or...or any other date really. You are a wonderful guy and it was so great meeting you but… I can’t be the one you want. Honestly... I’m already taken. I hope you understand and, if it’s not too insensitive of me, that we can part ways friendly. I’m sorry. I hope you find the happiness you’re looking for. You deserve it.”

Closing her cellphone, Juliet collapsed on her couch, for that second missing her cat, which by now would be cuddled in her lap, a comfortable presence to fulfill the loneliness but, for the first time in three weeks she was finally relaxed, her mind more clear and her heart less heavy.

Now was her time to find her own happiness and Juliet dared to say that he was still at Psych, watching Pretty in Pink like any other Friday night.

**Author's Note:**

> Soon, if everything works out, a CHRISTMAS FIC will be coming your way! So excited about it! <3


End file.
